Even though I have been saying this often it never hit me hard until now I think... I seriously wont be able to come to London after next week!!. How am I going to see you?.. I know I can always talk to you through the phone but its not the same is it.
You know when I walk pass coffee shops the smell reminds me of you..(funny I said that I think of you all the time anyway) I never used to drink coffee until I met you. Didnt even know the difference of Lattes, mochas and cappuccinos and etc etc.. ha ha now I am an expert!!.
For the 1st time in my life, I have started not likeing the summer!, I loved the past winter, I loved kissing you under the london eye,. now I hardly get to kiss you. Rememer I said I love your smell the other day? you know why..? those days when I used to like you so much and never ever thought anything will happen between us, the only thing I had of you is the smell. That's all I could have from you.. when you used to come near me I used to take a deep breath.. and then I smelt you even at home.... So I still like your smell.. it reminds me of that time I loved you sectretly.
I sometimes wonder why I met you like this... why we fell for each other... Do u??

Hmmm, I dont want to go to Barbados! Do u know why, You are not going to belive this. I dont like the feeling of being so far away from you. Seriously!!. That's why I had to follow you when you went to Sri Lanka last time.
You know I was thinking last night, Your mom passed away at the same time as I was in Thailand right? So when she went to heaven she probably met that God I told you about and said to him "my little boy needs lots of love.. he seemed a bit lonely" and probably the God said "A girl visited me today and said she had lots of love to give and she too was lonely... lets see what I can do"...
Ok ok I know my imagination isn't going to make me the next J.K Rolling, but as silly as that story sounded I believe it!!! yeah.. a part of me does.
I love u sooooo much..

I didn't write anything for a long time. I guess I was a bit down.
You know I remembered recently, when I went to Thailand, I went to this temple and our tourist guide said there is this statue there believed to be a God, and if you stick this gold piece of paper on it and wish something it comes true. I never believed in these things so I sticked that piece of paper and wished for love and to feel love and to be loved...!! that night I left Thailand to come to England and reached home around 1 am in the morning, next day I started my work experience...!!! I wonder what I'd wish for if I go there again....
I wonder if that statue did anything or not but you made me feel every single feeling I was craving for, (even the bad once like jealousy, anger, ) and you made me feel alive. I think of you all the time and I dream of you when I sleep. I don't even know how all this happened,, Do u? but I wont change a single minute of it.. even the times I was hurt.. the times I felt like you didn't care.. I wont change any of it.
love u..
xxx